November 26, 2012

When a year starts to draw to a close, I look back and wonder what I could have done differently. As a parent, it's probably impossible to avoid this. It's difficult not to second-guess yourself, once a little distance comes into play.

Most projects that we undertake can be learning experiences. You might not repeat the exact same project but when you do similar ones, you can apply the things you've learned and hope for a different outcome. You might be more patient, more attentive to detail, less forceful. Rearing children does NOT work that way. If you do something wrong when they're three, you can't do it better later. You can't un-yell or re-discipline. What's done is done. But you can be better when they're four and hope to rework habits you've ingrained in yourself and them.

In a few (too short) months, I will be 34, Ben will be 12, Lily will be 4, and Izzy will be 6. I'm halfway resigned to being done with baby-ish years but these numbers are a little scary. I can't go back and redo the 2's and 3's. I wish I could, for many reasons.

Next fall, Lily will officially be starting Pre-K. Which seems silly to say... Pre-K with Izzy was learning the alphabet, coloring, and trying to learn to use scissors. Lily has already begun this process because she cannot  seem to leave anything or anyone alone during school hours.

A couple of months ago, Chad was out of town for a week so I painted the living room. I really wanted to paint the girls' room but I couldn't figure out how to do that with them up. So the living room is a beautifully soft grey and the girls' room is still a tacky off white. Chad's out of town again for a few days this week so maybe I'll set the girls up in my room for a couple of hours and get started on their walls. I should be able to knock it out in a day, if I don't lose my mind trying to keep them in check. haha

October 8, 2012

It has begun! I am officially attempting to de-clutter the house.

So far, I've turned around all my clothing hangers and cleaned up the kitchen pantry a bit. I understand the concept of breaking things down into small, manageable tasks. I'm actually glad when a 'challenge' comes with instructions to not overwhelm myself or set unrealistic goals for the day/week/month. But then I get impatient and think "But I don't want to wait till next week to clean the hall closet. Maybe I should do one task a day instead of one a week. And the garage needs to be sorted out... and toys donated... and cabinets reorganized..." You get the general idea.

I thought we were finally all done with whooping cough but the cool front brought new respiratory aggravation. Praying it is gone quickly because hearing all the hacking and sniffling is depressing.

October 4, 2012

Decluttering Tasks » The Organised Housewife:

'via Blog this'

A friend of mine posted about this on the Facebook the other day and I've tried and tried to take a look at it but I just can't seem to get organized enough to free up the hour or so it'll take to peruse the list of tasks. haha. Isn't funny how that works? To find time to learn how to declutter/organize, you have to first somehow BE organized. *sigh*

Also, I tried to post this yesterday and failed to complete it. That should say something...

September 21, 2012

A Google search for "how many toys should a child have" turns up an uncomfortable number of articles, blog entries, and comments about how limiting your kids' toy supply actually helps them get along better and encourages greater obedience. Becoming Minimalist and The Mother Company are just a couple of hits.   

And then there's this gem from Yahoo! Answers: Wowza. Yes, scroll down to the 'winning' answer. I wonder if that mama feels the same now as she claimed to 4 years ago. Heck, I wonder if she felt the same 4  HOURS later when it was time to clean them all up. 

In the last few months, I've boxed away a few types of toys that were of the 'spill and forget' variety. Squinkies, Zoobles, Littlest Pet Shop, Lil Woodzeez... all cute and little and just a pain in the rear to clean up constantly. If they got played with for more than 15 minutes, the chorus of  "know where my ____ is, Mommy?" would start. They were treasures to hide away but now that they've been put away for the last month, they've hardly been sought out at all. 

Why am I rambling about this? Oh yeah... because I've been donating garbage bags full of 'stuff' over the last few months and it still feels like we have too much. Granted, some of those things have been old clothes, shoes, kitchen gadgets that weren't being used, and the like. But a pretty hefty amount of toys have gone out the door, too. The girls sometimes ask for things that are waiting to go to Goodwill but most of the time, they don't seem to notice anything has changed in their playroom. And yet still, they fight over what they do have and try to hide things away in their 'special' drawers or boxes. I hate to discard baby dolls and stuffed animals but when they just get dumped on the floor and wallowed in, they aren't precious anymore, right? Argh. It's astounding but I find myself sometimes surprised by the reality of it all: they won't suffer if they have fewer toys, they won't lose their ability to imagine or create, and (surprise!) I will be less frustrated with 'clean up time' if there is less to wade through. 

Some of this just been bouncing around in my head for the last 4 years (yeah... Izzy was 1 before she had any real amount of toys) and tonight's reading here at Simply Charlotte Mason just gave me a little nudge. I think Sunday may be a toy purging day for us. I hope I'm ready for a few weeks of 'I'm bored!'

September 19, 2012

Last year, I think I made some sort of pledge to myself to stop going places in schlumpy clothes and even to try not to bum around the house that way. It's not attractive, I don't like the idea of someone coming to the house unexpected and seeing me all sloppy, and it just makes me feel better to dress a bit.

I have seriously fallen off that wagon. I'm actually trying to rationalize taking the girls to ballet class while still in my super-sloppy big t-shirt and sweat pants. Argh. I must need new pants if I just can't stand the idea of putting them on.

September 16, 2012

Holy toot, it's been nearly 2 months since I had anything to say. haha. Riiiiiiiiiight...

This school year has started off pretty well. We've had our "I just don't LIKE school" days and our "Yay! I love this!" days. But we're plugging away and I think we're making progress. Math has been a bit of a struggle, as we learn to skip-count by 5s. I find myself to be impatient but I'm realizing that in all the ways that my daughter is like me, struggling with math and learning to read may very well be the biggest. I don't remember really having a hard time with math till Algebra but it's quite possible that I did and just don't remember the early couple of years. However, I remember quite well the frustration involved in learning to read. I must have been 7 or 8 before it truly "clicked" because I can recall trying to read a book to a visiting uncle and being in tears over it. Once it all fell into place, I never took a break and I certainly hope I'm able to help Izzy reach that point with as few tears as possible.

Lily has been a bit of a hellion lately. I know it's the budding independence and desire to be the 'decider' but.. oh. my. goodness. It's been super exhausting keeping up with her shenanigans. I'm humbled by it, quite frankly. I can only imagine how ha Shem feels when we struggle against His plan for us. It must seem as tho we're devoting all our efforts to not growing up. As we celebrated Rosh Hashanah last night and today, I have been reminded that if I want to encourage my children to turn away from their naughty behavior, I have to set the example of making teshuvah myself. In the coming weeks, as I seek to instill better habits in my children, I'm hoping to turn away from impatience, being easily frustrated, and feelings of inadequacy.

We've been incorporating Torah time into our school routine and I feel like that is an important step. This past week's Torah portion was perfectly timed for this:

11. For this commandment which I command you this day, is not concealed from you, nor is it far away.
12. It is not in heaven, that you should say, "Who will go up to heaven for us and fetch it for us, to tell [it] to us, so that we can fulfill it?"
13. Nor is it beyond the sea, that you should say, "Who will cross to the other side of the sea for us and fetch it for us, to tell [it] to us, so that we can fulfill it?"
14. Rather,[this] thing is very close to you; it is in your mouth and in your heart, so that you can fulfill it.

The portion goes on to remind us to choose life, not only for our sake, but for the sake of our children.

July 18, 2012

Today marks 5 years since Izzy was born. 5 YEARS! It seems like forever and such a short time ago, all at once.

Her independent nature shines more and more each day and I'm excited to be along for this part of her journey through life.

A couple of days ago, I was letting the kids take turns playing around on the piano. When it was Izzy's turn, we were more than a little surprised to hear her picking out notes to string together in a melody and then repeat that melody. She hums and sings to herself constantly so I guess it shouldn't surprise me that she can create other forms of music when given the opportunity. This sort of thing falls in the 'terrifies mommy' category because it reminds me that I'm responsible for her education but not in control of her interests or talents.

Last weekend, Izzy wanted to sit next to one of her friends at Temple. My first inclination was to make her sit with me so that I'd know she was behaving. But then it occurred to me that kids don't have an opportunity to behave unless you allow them to practice. So for the next hour, Izzy and Adam shared a seat (I know! so cute!) and whispered and giggled very quietly. I wish I knew what they talked about, it looked so sweet. He commented on her shoes, I think, and was playing with her hair. It's hard for me to acknowledge that she is having a life of her own, already. When kids are babies and toddlers, it's easy to fool yourself into thinking they are mini versions or even just extensions of yourself. And then suddenly they are separate entities with their own dreams and desires and futures. So hard to let go.